NEW DELHI: “Don’t speak of himmat (courage) now. I have no himmat left. Yeh himmat nahin hai majboori hai, (this is not courage but helpless necessity), I have no choice,” she sobs. It will be one year on October 14 since her son Najeeb disappeared from Jawaharlal Nehru University, and there has been no trace of him since.

Nafees Fatima who was the face for many a protest by students and civil society in Delhi, as she ran from pillar to post to convince the authorities and the police to trace her missing boy, is today completely broken. In Delhi to pursue the court case----the hearing for which has now been postponed to October 16---she is not at all well, and has to undergo several investigations now to determine the cause. She has no place to stay as the relatives that she camped with initially have also turned away, and she now stays for a night or so courtesy Colin Gonsalves, a Supreme Court advocate with a heart.

Ever since Najeeb’s disappearance her family has sunk into deep despair and health difficulties. Her husband, already paralysed from an earlier accident, is now in depression. Her other son is jobless, and now the health that she had relied on seems to be failing. “I just want my Najeeb back, please return him to me, I will not ask for anything, I will just go away quietly,” she weeps.

You still have hope? “I can only hope until my last breath, what other choice do I have?” she responds between sobs.

Najeeb had disappeared from his hostel room in JNU after an altercation with ABVP students. The police has come with not a single lead, and despite protests urging action there has been no movement forward of any kind on this case.

On the other side, a father whose son Junaid was killed on a train famously referred to as the Ballabgarh lynching, has suffered a heart attack because of the continuing stress and mental trauma. Just 46 years, Jalaluddin has been hospitalised since. He has been under a lot of stress, according to the family, since one of the accused was released on bail.

Here too the family members recounted a similar story of deep stress since the attack on the young boy returning with his brothers from Delhi after Eid shopping. Junaid’s mother Saira told reporters that life for the family had changed completely after the traumatic incident.